Reflections on leadership, a journey of change and growth

How would you describe yourself as a leader? Are you kind and compassionate, with people naturally following you? Are you energetic, enthusiastic, and able to inspire those around you to help the company thrive? And are you running on auto-pilot, or do you have a sense of purpose and the courage to be authentic in your work? 

The answer depends on what stage of leader you are in. Great leadership is not something achieved overnight, but a journey where you need to build on your knowledge, experience and techniques and go through various stages to succeed. 

While there are many classifications describing the phases a leader goes through to achieve excellency, I preferred to share from personal experience how this process organically follows four main stages. 

The informal leader 

"Become the kind of leader that people would follow voluntarily, even if you had no title or position." (Brian Tracy) 

I think everyone agrees that leadership is not about title or position. It’s about behaviour, attitude and actions. It’s about the example you set and the way you choose to help and support people around you, irrespective of your position within the organization. 

All the leaders I know started to lead long before they got the official title. At least the good ones 😊 

They started small, acting like facilitators within their team, listening and supporting their peers during rough times, fostering meaningful work and meaningful relationships. 

All these build trust and they get to be respected and accepted as leaders by the group. This is the extraordinary thing about leading informally – you get permission before the position. By the time you are officially appointed team lead (or any other leading position title), you already have your team’s approval to guide them and their full support. 

I remember the experience which got me into an informal leading situation. I was moved into a new team with no official role or position whatsoever, only with my manager’s indication that I should “maybe try to change some things” as the team was dysfunctional on many levels. Well, it wasn’t easy to initiate change within a group where tension was often in the air, communication was lacking, and most importantly, there was no trust among the team members. I admit it was difficult at times, requiring a lot of patience and resilience to rejection, to demonstrate my good intentions. But I think nothing is impossible when you genuinely care about people, see their strengths and bring them to light, listen to their needs, and try to help as much as you can.  

Once trust was developed, everyone contributed to growing a productive and successful team, capable of overcoming challenges and achieving any goal they set their minds on. 

The appointed leader

"No man will make a great leader who wants to do it all himself, or to get all the credit for doing it." (Andrew Carnegie) 

As an informal leader, you rely a lot on intuition. People may choose to follow you because of your knowledge and expertise, your empathy and moral support or, why not, for your personality and charisma. 

But it takes more than that to become a good leader. 

The second stage of leadership is about structure and results. It’s when you take responsibility for the success of a project or a team. At this point, you are in charge of taking the plan from strategic leadership and implementing it together with the team; you are now the link between the two. 

At the same time, even if now you might have KPIs and a stricter agenda to follow, this is also the moment you need to let go of control. Outcomes are not in your direct hands anymore (unless you want to micromanage people, and that’s bad 😊) so delegation is key. You must empower your team and trust they will do a good job. 

The biggest challenge I faced after being promoted to my first project manager position was to delegate. It wasn’t that I didn’t trust the team. I knew they were smart and competent people and that I could totally rely on them. But I felt somehow disconnected from the team, not being able to get directly involved in different activities at their side, same as before. 

The turning point was when, during a 360° feedback session, I got the same feedback from more than half of the team members, that I seemed to be overwhelmed and they felt unable to help. Then I realized I wasn’t only pilling up countless tasks on my plate, but I also deprived them of a learning experience and hindered their growth. 

At this stage, it’s also wise to start investing in your personal growth - read, attend trainings and workshops, go to therapy and… read some more. From here onward, intuition is no longer enough; you have to really start to understand how people’s minds work, or otherwise you will not be able to pass to the next stage. 

The authentic leader 

“It’s not the mountain we conquer, but ourselves.” —Edmund Hillary 

You’re leading teams and projects for a while now. You give meaningful feedback, do performance evaluations, deliver successful projects, and make sure the clients are satisfied - you do what a great stage two leader should do and that’s to produce results.  

While it’s great to be an efficient leader, it’s also important to ask yourself if the work you do reflects your inner values. It becomes your responsibility to grow the next generation of leaders. They need an authentic and ethical leader, who can guide and inspire them through their journey. To be able to do this, it’s important to first take a deep look at yourself and find your true north. 

The phrase “discover your true north” was coined by Harvard Business School professor and author Bill George in his bestselling book by the same name. Bill George explains that discovering your true north is about following your internal compass to find your authentic self. It’s a combination of your purpose and your beliefs.   

We often feel pressured to achieve goals and objectives. And we may be driven sometimes by rewards and incentives to be successful. But when we get tied up trying to be what we think a “great leader” looks like, we can end up chasing our tails. So, beyond all this external noise, we should remain connected to who we truly are and recurrently ask ourselves questions like: 

Why do I want to lead? What do I want to achieve through my leadership? 

Do I have a sense of purpose? Is my work aligned with my personal vision? 

Would my team still follow me if it weren’t for my position in the company? 

I’m now going through this process myself and already learned a lot about who I want to be next as a leader. For me, it’s about supporting the community, about shifting my focus and energy to helping others in their leadership journey and creating a safe space for other leaders to learn and develop. 

The influential leader 

“The final test of a leader is that he leaves behind him in other men the conviction and the will to carry on.” – Walter Lippmann 

This is the highest level of leadership, one that only a few leaders reach. These leaders are well-known for their accomplishments, how they’ve enriched the lives of others, and led their organizations to change the world for the better. 

At this stage, you don’t have any direct impact anymore, yet everything you do has an indirect impact – your leadership created a culture and you are now leading through that culture.  

You have to be a conscious leader, fully present in your actions and aware of their consequences. People are watching you now more than ever, and follow you for what you represent, so you need to be honest, consistent, and authentic in what you do.  

You have the ability to influence and inspire people, you indirectly model behaviours and this comes with great responsibility. You impact the organization at every level – people’s well-being, future leadership roles, vision, mission, strategy, and culture – all these are your legacy. 

I think not many get to this point and that’s just fine, still, we should at least make it our long-term goal and continue to follow and learn from the ones that successfully reached this stage. I personally admire Adam Grant, Brené Brown, Jacinda Ardern, Mahatma Gandhi.  

Conclusion 

You must be vulnerable enough to admit you don’t know it all and have the courage to look at your mistakes and be open to learning from them. This correlated with an insatiable hunger for growth and development prepares you for success as a leader. 

The leadership journey is long and challenging. The beauty of it though is that with every level you’ve accomplished, you become more fulfilled not only as a leader but also as a person.  

Where are you on your leadership journey? What challenges are you currently facing to step to the next leadership stage? 

Written with love by

Madalina Nechifor